Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Day 88: In Pursuit of Peace
As I have written here before, just when you need it the most, you see or find the right quote, the right song, or the right person.
This quote was actually in the Daily Fish Wrapper er...Breeze this a.m. It is another sad example of how someone didn't listen to themselves. It was in the paper today because it is the anniversary of Woolf's death, which was a suicide (she drowned herself). Obviously she didn't believe what she was saying, and thought that avoiding life really was the only way to find peace. Talk about saying one thing and doing another, so tragic.
It also shows once again, that, no matter how gifted, creative, talented or intelligent somebody is, everyone has issues and problems, if you avoid dealing with them, they become much bigger than they are, or ever need to be, and can literally destroy you.
I have spent the past 48 1/2 years avoiding, ignoring or hiding from mine. In my 49th year, I am finally starting to figure out that avoiding only postpones the inevitable, it does not prevent it. Even though I am not a psychologist or therapist (and, I don't even play one on TV) I have learned that you cannot compartmentalize or separate one part of your life from the other to avoid dealing with the things that make you unhappy or that are problems for you. If you think you can, you are only fooling yourself and it is only a matter of time before those worlds collide and the collision is not pleasant for you, or those around you.
I only wish I had learned that earlier, or had taken my own advice and listened to my own intuition, but, I didn't (at least now I have plenty of things to blog about :-D). All I can do now is move forward and keep facing things head on. While it is not always easy and it often stings, much like when you rip a bandage off, after the initial pain, a sense of calm and yes, even peace starts to show up.